fucked up.
12.11.2006

i'm in a TOTALLY spoilt, rotten, buay song with everything mood now. I am very very very angry with this fucking agency called ACHIEVE CAREER CONSULTANT. friends, be warned... never go into this agency. they're a bunch of idiots who duno anything. Especially this so called "SENIOR CONSULTANT" LYNN, who does not know anything. i FEEL LIKE SMACKING her damn face and slapping her!

i think i'm going mad or sth. last night i did not even sleep at all because of my neighbour's stupid dog that barked the whole night.. sigh... i'm very sad and moody now. I tink my bad temperedness and everything is coming back. i dun tink i'll ever cure like this... i can't control my character and my bad temperedness.

this morning i quarelled with my mom... the whole day i felt moody and when i receive a slip of paper from the stupid bloody agency i got even more mad. every morning of work I suffer like mad. i feel so cold because of the air con... some ppl even ask me why Im wearing a wind breaker to work. something is seriously wrong with me... i keep catching a cold from morning to the end of the day in my office with a wind breaker on. i really hate this... i went to see the doctor she say i got some allergy and gave me some medicine, but the medicine hardly works... i duno wad's going on with me anymore... i tink im having some psychological problem that makes me so worked up over small little things and worry about every thing. I hate this kind of useless worrying and mood swings. I hate myself for being so useless and timid sometimes....

there's nobody i can turn to at such times except dearie... and dearie is very busy with his own work to do. im always blabbering all my problems to him after he has such a stressed up day. I'm being nth but a nuisance...

i have a lack of close friends that i can talk to and gif me good advice i dun even go out with frens now... da jie is very busy... i dun want to disturb her but i know she's one whu always supports me and help me in times of need.. when i was in poly all my frens know i dun go out and like to stay at home and play games.. now i use every weekend to spend all the time with dearie but sometimes i envy other ppl whu have many good frens that they can spend time with...

anyway the reason why im angry with achieve is because of many things... i dun tink i want to talk about it anymore.. after all i have about 2-3 more weeks of work and i'm going to stop working even though my manager wants me to work for them until end of jan. its not because i dun like working there.. even though the work is alot but im quite happy with my colleagues and boss there. i just dun wan to be under that stupid agency. they've given me enuff problems, i don't wish to talk to her at all.

haiz... i'm going to watch ouran high school host club now.. i hope that will cheer me up.


K0towari 19:59